Core Competency

“Stay in you Lane and Trust the Process!”

One of the biggest challenges facing us today is the number of options that exist to do anything and everything you are trying to do.  There are probably hundreds of blogs out there centered on personal development and finding purpose.  Weight loss programs?  Probably numbers in the 1,000’s in terms of the number of methods that exist.  Career choices, places to live, car to drive, clothing to own, smartphones to use, and so on…

While this is useful in terms of opportunities for advancement, it can be detrimental if our focus and energy become so spread that we are not spending significant time in one space to see real fruit from our labors.  This is the big challenge for entrepreneurs in today’s world.  Really, it’s the challenge for anyone in today’s Gig Economy.  You may not have your own business but your life represents ‘You Inc.’.  As I say on the homepage, “Success in any difficult endeavor is predicated upon consistent behavior for significant amounts of time.”  Life is a difficult endeavor.  I know business owners and stay at home parents who grind and grind and grind.  They work hard and get frustrated because they are not seeing the results they want in their life.  What’s the problem?  Usually, it boils down to trying to do, too many things, and they can’t be good at all of them.  Listen to me people, YOU CAN’T DO EVERYTHING!  Or you can, but you aren’t going to do any of it well.  The key is to have a developed understanding of what you want your life to look like in the future and scrutinize the commitments you make against that vision.  We have to learn the power of ‘No!’.

As I explain in the video, social media and website design are not my core skill sets or services as an entrepreneur.  I am a Character Development Coach and a Speaker.  However, when I started my solo endeavor 3 years ago, everything on the internet, many of my good friends, everything I researched on marketing, said that social media and hits on my website was the way to get clients.  I got funneled into to that thought process but the problem is, I’m not good at social media or website design.  I don’t use social media in my own personal life, let alone trying to develop my client base through it.  My skill set is Character Development so why am I spending hours of time and 100’s of dollars on something that’s not my lane in order to attract customers?  The thought of spending hours a week on social media trying to respond to every comment or message is, in itself, exhausting.  If you love your phone or computer that much or you are super savvy at it, then got for it.  I’ll pass.  I shine when I interface with people face-to-face.  Furthermore, I suck at internet stuff.  This final realization is what caused me to set up a simple website and start blogging once a month.  Now I can put more energy into my primary skill set and it’s been beautiful.  Turns out, word of mouth is still a valid way to attract clients.  Has it been tempting to get funneled into more internet tactics?  Yes, but I keep coming back to the fact that that’s not my lane and, therefore, not where I need to focus my energy.  Is it a valid way to attract clients?  Sure it is!  And when I have the money to pay somebody who has expertise in that area, I will.  Today, I will focus on the simplest method available to me to leverage my expertise.  That is, engaging people directly.

I’ve seen this play out is so many ways and in so many areas of life.  We go from one fitness routine to the next, never accumulating significant time with the one.  One business idea to the next, never accumulating significant time with the one.  We move from one city to the next, never building any roots anywhere and wondering why we feel lonely and disconnected.  Dare I say it, one romantic relationship to the next, never stopping to work on ourselves and constantly blaming others for not being ‘this’ or ‘that’.  What causes this erratic nature?  I think one phrase sums it up:  Instant Gratification.  Why stick with a process you are currently in, when there is another process that promises results right now?  Why keep dating a person that’s not perfect, when you can free yourself and go back to daydreaming about someone who is perfect (absolutely ridiculous)?

The problem isn’t work ethic.  The problem is expectations.  Expectations that things are supposed to come quickly.  Expectations that we reach a point where our character is fully matured and there is no more to learn or do.  “If I can just get there…”  “If I can just do this…”  “If just had this…” – Then life would be good, so let me do whatever I can to speed it up.  Even if it causes my focus to be spread and my results to be consistently mediocre…

Here’s what I think we have to ask ourselves, “What if I focused on doing a few simple things, well… For several years?”  What if you didn’t go to every event that your friends invited you to?  What if you focused on a few simple compound movements at the gym?  What if you didn’t spend time trying to broadcast your business on every social media platform known to man?  What if you turned your phone off at 7:30 pm every night?  What if your phone wasn’t the first thing you looked at in the morning?  What if you sat in silence on the morning drive to work?  What if you didn’t try to overhaul your diet all at once?

Trust and Focus.  Listen, I don’t know what you believe in, but life is inherently a faith exercise.  Certainly, if you are going to see any real sustained success in anything.  When you farm, you plant a seed in faith.  You say to yourself, “If I do the work to learn about agriculture, if I do the work to care for the soil properly, then the seed will produce a crop at a point in the future.”  When a person invest seed capital in a business endeavor, the same idea is at play.  The investors (“farmers”) are placing faith in the ‘soil’ of the business idea and those who have decided to launch it.  Many investors will provide ongoing mentorship and resources in a metaphorical effort to cultivate the ‘soil’ which is the entrepreneur.  All this is done in faith.  It’s not blind faith either.  The market demands, the skill sets, the experiences etc. of the parties involved are assessed to determine if the ‘soil’ is good.  Hopefully, the implied understanding is patience and diligence in cultivation.

What I can’t do as a farmer is pull up the seed every 3 weeks because it hasn’t produced a massive harvest in such a short period of time.  I have to see the process through the entire season and sometimes, there maybe a drought or a bad crop yield.  During disappointment, I have to understand that becoming a successful farmer is going to include failure and I have to be willing to learn, adjust, and try again.  If I believe in what I do, then I have to stay within the parameters of my life and trust the process.

People, I love you.  For Real.  GIVE IT TIME!  Whatever ‘it’ is.  And PLEASE, FOCUS!  I know we live in the information era and scientific/technology advancements are allowing us to do some amazing things at incredible speed.  However, anything worth having is worth fighting for and fight for a LONG TIME.  Anything significant that I have ever accomplished in life took focus and patience.  Stay in your lane and trust the process.

This month I want you to ask yourself 2 questions:

  1. Am I trying to do too much?  Am I trying to focus on too many things and not getting anywhere? 
  2. Am I letting the desire for quick results for any one area of my life, cause my expectations to be unreal and my behavior to be sporadic?  

I love You!  God Bless You!


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